I've completed the prelude to Psychoanalytic training at the Institute of Psychoanalytic Education which is affiliated with New York University Medical School. And have completed Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy Certificate program at the Alanson J. White Institute. Both of these training have helped me understand how people relate to one another and why we CHOOSE certain partners. Yes, we unconsciously CHOOSE to get involved with either a distant or needy/clingy partner.

I apply both psychoanalytic and attachment theory when dealing with couples or single adults. By learning about attachment, you can build healthier, attuned relationships, and communicate more effectively.

What is Attachment Theory?

Mary Ainsworth, a psychologist conducted a study with infant/toddlers and their caregivers; Ainsworth devised an assessment technique called the Strange Situation Classification (SSC) in order to investigate how attachments might vary between children. Ainsworth suggested that behavior in the strange situation classification was determined by the behavior of the primary carer (in this case the mother).

Someone’s attachment style can influence how they feel in their relationships (satisfaction, love, etc.), as well as a wide variety of behaviors including communication, conflict, break-ups, and sex. For example, anxious preoccupied individuals deal with rejection and break-ups by jumping from one serious relationship to the next very quickly (rebounding). Avoidant individuals are more likely to seek superficial physical/sexual encounters with others (e.g., one-night stands) outside the context of a committed relationship.